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Mar 1, 2018

Ahalya

Overnight mist blanketed the sky over river Ganges. Soon, the first rays of the rising sun would melt them and make way for a clear morning sky. Gautama arrived at the riverbank, disrobed himself, jumped into the river and took a bath. The ice-cold water on his naked body woke each and every cell, made him feel rejuvenated.

It is during twilight that Gautama would take a bath in river Ganges and perform his morning rituals, followed by offering prayers to the Sun God. He would chant the mantra to Sun God, requesting him to help remove his ignorance and fill his mind with the light of knowledge.

But on that particular day, the Sun God did not appear to accept his offering. Foggy night obscured the view of the moon-lit sky. Deep darkness prevailed everywhere, including his mind.

"Why am I feeling different today?", he asked the question to himself. He could not continue with his daily ritual. Something was bothering him.

"I must find out what is going on with me," he said with determination. He stopped his rituals mid-way, walked home deeply contemplating on his thoughts. He lost control of his mind, and in turn, his senses. A sudden feeling of sexual urge pervaded him. Every part of his body longed to have sex with a beautiful girl.

"If thinking about sex gives me so much pleasure, how would I feel if I actually have it?", his mind asked lustily. He knew the answer.

"Having sex would give me the same feeling as being crowned as king of heaven[1]. But what about my penance?", he engaged his mind with the conversation.

"Don't you want to enjoy all that the materialistic world has to offer?"

"I am a sage. I had renounced everything, and I am living a detached life in a small hut deep inside this forest. Of what use is the worldly enjoyment to me?"

"You had lived your entire life as an A-halya[2]. Now you deserve to have sex and feel what it is like to be the king of heaven", his mind lured him with pleasing words.

He almost gave up arguing with his mind. "Maybe my mind is correct. I have not had sex with a woman in my entire life. Don't I deserve to experience sex at least once?" he asked himself.

Years of penance had taught him how to deal with an open mind. Soon, like the mist exposed to the first ray of sun, the darkness that prevailed in his mind also disappeared.

"How could I even think of having materialistic enjoyment?", he asked himself disbelieving he allowed his mind to lure him. "I deserve to be punished."

He could neither curse A-halya nor the thought of becoming king of heaven!

"Dear Ram, the noblest of all noblemen in this world, please forgive me for my sinful thoughts. Make my mind numb like a stone, that which cannot have any feelings", he prayed to Lord Ram. "I surrender unto your Lotus feet. Please have mercy on me and take complete control of myself".

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[1] Lord Indra.
[2] A-halya means un-plowed, which can also mean a virgin.

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